Lesson 30: Identifying Self-imposed Expectations and Building Habits To Better Show Up For Yourself

Hello beautiful humans! Happy Sunday!

First, thank you all so much for supporting our online store launch. I have so loved seeing you all receive your limited edition merch over the last week! The quote on this collection, ‘We Can Do Hard Things,’ has been such a powerful daily reminder for me the last 2.5 months, now it gets to do the same IRL for each of you. Here’s your discount code (LL10) if you are still interested in purchasing. Enter it at checkout to apply 10% off!

Next up, it’s the Champagne Episode of Lessons Learned! I’m 30 years old, and this is the 30th episode of the podcast – what a fun milestone to hit! This is my first time sitting down to record in three weeks. I’ve struggled to feel ready to hit record because of expectations I have had of myself. As I worked through those expectations, I found the courage to sit and speak into my mic.

This week on the show, I share about navigating the deadlines and expectations that have been suffocating me, and how I worked through them towards action.

A major expectation I needed to own is that I don’t want kids right now. Once quarantine started, and our tour was postponed, I felt a self-imposed pressure to try to start growing our family. Mitch and I had discussed waiting a year or more, but for some reason, this season of uncertainty made us reconsider. After much of my 20s being filled with surgeries and being unwell, giving myself permission to take another year or more to enjoy my health and build my business without thinking about bringing little humans into the world has been wildly freeing.

Making this crucial decision led me to reflect on why I had been feeling blocked by these expectations and deadlines about having kids, and what these expectations were rooted in: external pressures and my own. These expectations were blocking me from being fully present and in my flow. Once I owned my decision, I gained so much clarity.

In this episode, I walk you through what unpacking all this was like, and how I found my flow after owning my truth. I talk about: 

  • Identifying self-imposed deadlines and expectations (14:20) 

  • Finding freedom in having that inner dialogue with yourself and sitting in your truth (15:30)

  • Setting boundaries and showing up for yourself in navigating expectations and giving yourself grace when you can’t meet them  (16:00)

  • How our habits and intuition can become blocked when we expect too much of ourselves (20:00)

  • Finding yourself in your purpose and your flow as we all undergo a collective trauma  (23:00)

  • What flow looks like for me and how these four non-negotiable aspects of my morning routine have helped me better show up for myself and others: MMMT (Meditate, Motivate, Move, Track) (18:50)

  • Identifying habits that serve you to better show up for yourself and those around you (33:00)

This week’s episode is about how you can identify and become aware of expectations and self-imposed deadlines to get closer to your inner truth. I talk about how reflecting on these expectations and re-examining them can help us feel lighter, and how establishing healthy habits that turn our focus inwards can help us fully show up for ourselves and others during these times.

Does my experience sound familiar to you? We’ve organized some helpful questions that you can ask yourself to reflect on these topics into journal prompts. I hope working through these can make you feel more freedom and joy in your life. 

“My intention and my hope for you this week, is that you can have moments of nourishment. That you can have moments where you feel whole and well. Where you can celebrate yourself for how you have shown up for the last two and a half months of this quarantine. And where you can give yourself grace. I hope you can choose something to do each day that feels really damn good. And I hope you can be gentle with yourself. As you break down your expectations of both yourself and the people around you.”

Remember to give yourself grace. 

As always, if this episode or the prompts resonate with you, feel free to share this with a friend or two. We appreciate you all so much, and are so excited to share a new creation with you in a few weeks time. Stay tuned for more exciting news.

Until next week,